Inner piece

I have no idea how it’s called. Whatever. The most important thing to have it. To stay calm in any situation. I had so much trouble with self-control…like a volcano. You never know what’s gonna happen next. Although, I realized I just wanna stay calm. Tried a lot of things. Neither of them worked. Everything and everyone distracted me a lot. I tried to read Iyengar couple of times. Such an amazing book but it’s not gonna help you if you already stressed. The secret is to found inner piece by changing the way you looking at the situation. Sandra taught me to zoom out you problems. Well, they are important..for you ? But what about you town, country, world?  I guess its just family problems, endless relationship problems, troubles of work…I can carry on describing all the possible problems till this blog ends.

It’s important to have a cold mind. Sometimes, it’s good to shake up, lose control, scout, scream…but not all the time.  You don’t wanna be a volcano. It makes people feel uncomfortable around you. Sooner or later everyone is just tired.

I was tired of being a volcano. This state of mind just takes so much energy. I think I just don’t have any power for the emotions because of the killing workout anyway. I tried to experiment and went to the cardio section. It’s soooo boring…omg. I could only stay there for 15 min and went back to my usual weighting section which feels like home. I guess iI am obsessed with it. Hell knows. When I thought I can’t do anymore, I remembered people who I don’t like and did one more set. Such a motivation ! I guess I need to thank them for that.

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life is unfair…

When you on a diet and trying to eat healthy and keep your abs, but  your flat is a minute walk from Mc Donalds and anytime you pass this place (at least 2 times per day) you imagine yourself eating a burger, Bic Mac, fries and amazing ice cream that tastes so good in your head and don’t forget about Cola. Cold and fizzy. Gosh. I want it.  I’m trying to concentrate my thoughts on something else, but I LOVE food more than anything (any food to be honest). I remind myself that my tight will grow even bigger but to be honest it doesn’t help. I still want it.

Life is even more unfair when you sitting in the office and your colleges brings cakes. NO. They actually place it near you so you can see this tasty cake all day long and amazing smell from cherries.

Sad thing is when I want something I get it 😦

 

 

My trip to China

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Well, well, well. I came back from China, Shanghai is amazing place. Although, I wish I could understand what people were saying to me. There were guys on the street, talking to me and I had no idea what do they mean. But, without language, I actually discovered so many good things. In the restaurant, I asked for tea. A woman brought me a glass of hot, ginger water. I used to hate ginger so much. But I guess, its time to change my default settings. Let’s say…a software update.

The other thing what stuck to my eyes was the lack of lighting in the shops that are off center. In my European understanding, when the shop is almost dark, its closed. But in China, it’s still open. I like all the eyes catching nice lighting on the building, streets and shops.

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The next thing that shocked me was e-bikes. They are very popular in China, much faster than a bike and yes, you

don’t need a driving license  for them. So, everyone can ride it…without common sense of rules. I was lucky to have a driver, because I have no idea what would happen if a drive in that country. People don’t actually look where they are driving because they have priority over cars.I saw three people on the e-bikes, where the last one was making selfie at the middle of the busy road. Then, I saw people traveling with dogs and even small children. Obviously, helmets aren’t popular too.  Every e-bike is a masterpiece, it has got it’s own unique style. Moreover, people bring blankets with them when they driving.

Ok, let’s talk about tea. All the tea that you can buy in the shop has nothing to do with the real tea. I felt in love with the Korean tea. It has got magical taste. I bought some tea for home, and I have no idea how I’m gonna survive when it’s gonna end. This is the reason why I haven’t bought anything from Chinese make up and skincare. I can’t even imagine what would happen with me. I even hate online shopping, it drives me insane and I hate hate waiting process. I decided to be mainstream, so I stick to my favorite MAC, Lancome, Diesel and Issey Miyake which are available for top ups everywhere.

I enjoyed spending time with Chinese people, I got to know their world, culture and life. Of course, I enjoyed the food so much. I have never ate that much sea food in my life. Greece was the last place where I ate octopus…and now I even ate shark. Last couple of months I was making myself eat, but I ate everything I saw in China. I even started my day with noodles. Architecture is amazing ! I couldn’t take my eyes of the buildings.

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Now, I can’t wait to be back.IMG_0579.jpgIMG_0584.jpg

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Vector Orchid

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I love orchids. I used to get them as a present from a very special person…but why should I wait for a present? So, I decided to bought it by myself. I just saw the perfect one, but on of the flowers has gone while I was driving home. Shame on me 😦

 

The strangest post you ever seen

2015 brought me a lot of bad moments. Couple of days left and there are more bad things coming. I have been hurt so many times. My reaction was to just give up on everything and everyone, never touch the notepad again and stop writing….but you know what?

I ain’t gonna stop, I m just gonna look at this situation from another point of view. Everyone left? I never understood how people can just forget each other so quickly…

Wait, that’s actually really good because you know who is your friend when you are in trouble. Atm I am by myself. Well, at least I don’t have pink glasses on me. I truly know who is who.

I will do opposite, I will draw as much as I can. I ll train harder than ever. Even the weather is crap, I’m gonna go for a run tomorrow.

I believe all these bad moments makes you stronger, makes you unique person. I don’t care. If I meant to be alone for a couple of years,  I m just gonna start enjoying it instead of crying/panicking/ blaming myself for being awful person.

If no one believes in me, I will be the one and only one !

2015 conclusion?

christmasOr it is too early?

I’ve got half of my NY resolutions sorted for 2015, so, next half is going to my 2016 resolutions.It’s okay, I will work harder than this year. And I don’t know why, but I didn’t include fitness goal, which is a shame. Although,now I can see why…probably because I don’t think fitness routine is a resolution for me…maybe because gym is my second home? I miss DW like crazy, I even had a dream last night that I am doing killing workout using stairs machine that makes me feeling dead anytime I use it…